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Wellness by Bonnie Brinkman

Jan 28, 2021

Isn’t it what we wish for in our lives? We are still in winter, a cold and bare season, that often presents itself with thoughts of hibernation and low energy. Some people let themselves go to dormant that they act as if they’re in a deep sleep, feeling moody, or even getting depressed. It’s a tougher time for us if we want to overcome it, due to the crises that surround us.

So, what can we do to brighten up this mood—or even further what can we do to have more experiences of WELLNESS?

It’s a huge term which measures something special for all of us. Perhaps it may help to read the following thoughts:

Think about what wellness means to You. Is it your health, prosperity, a loving relationship, a true connection with your kids? Or, maybe all of it. Whatever it is. Define it & focus on it for a few moments!

Given that there is a longing for it, it is something you don’t have yet. So, if you want to experience things you never experienced before, you have to do something that you haven’t done before. Think differently. Act differently. I know; easier said than done.

Now, here comes the rocky part of getting out of our comfort zone by thinking, replying and behaving differently, because it is hard to change our pattern and the way we’ve always been.
Think one thought or do one action differently each day.

Think one specific thought differently than usual and act in one situation differently than usual, and so on…

Direct one change at a time towards your goal of wellness starting today and continue doing so again, and again, and again….

Think about where you are going to be in 1 month, in 6 months, in 1 year?!

Why can these steps help you progress towards wellness?

The way we think and behave is due to the way in which certain neural connections in our brains have been established, due to all the experiences we ever had in our lives. These neural pathways determine how we think and behave. What we evaluate as good or bad and so on.

Imagine our brain connections like a mud road where many cars are driving after a rainfall. There are now many paths all over the place. When the sun shines again and dries out all these paths, they become hard and solid.

Now, when someone tries to drive here on their own path, it will be impossible to not drive into these other paths. To change these paths will require a lot of effort by the driver or another rainfall.

It is necessary to focus on a definite goal and take action toward it over and over again. This repetition develops new neural pathways in our brain; the good news!! It changes the hard and solid old pathways of our past. To accomplish feeling well more often, start with little steps that will have a tremendous impact. Little by little, the paths eventually will change towards our goal of wellness.

These are hardly times when we all feel well. For many excuses –er, I mean- reasons-, it is even more difficult to attend to self-care. Let’s acknowledge that the season and the times we live in, tend to pull us down; that breaking down new behaviors to their smallest components, may be what it takes to feel a bit better. This world seems to need us as healthy as we can be right now; let’s surprise ourselves and each other that we’re up to the test.

Bless us all and keep us well.

Bonnie Brinkman, and her wife, Darcy Jack, offer the 2-day training on Safe Conversations in the “Getting The Love You Want” workshop for couples created by Dr. Harville Hendrix, and his wife, Helen LaKelly Hunt.