Saying Yes Where You Are saying No

In my continuing work with Enneagram and self, it safe to say that the territory and landscape is getting more interesting,entangled and rich with the unexpected. I resist the temptation here to become too subjective,making this all about my story but rather hope that it finds resonance with all readers regardless their type and that whatever truth needs to come will in time do so for them. The  process has increasingly made it possible to choose yes where I might say no in life, which is where  the work unlocks the dammed up power of our self imposed prisons. 

Though it's been stated a thousand  ways,our habitual go to behaviors are strategies that keep us from experiencing novel behaviours and potentials. Since our work assumes all of us to be facets and permutations of one another,what's relevant for one type may often have value for another though it may be experienced and processed differently.

It is in this spirit that I ask where might you be saying "no" in your experience? I pose the question in this way because it carries a particular poignance for me as a 5. Let me put it more bluntly: When I am in type I am essentially a "no" person.

I say "no" or "no thank you" far more often than yes,that would give an affirmative nod to new experience. My general approach to life is one of cautious reserve and  polite distance. I can be a bit like the proverbial mule,not wanting to be pushed or pulled. Of course this retentive reflex is the driver of my suffering, but of late sitting with this has changed the texture and feel of this barrier to living a full life. 

The good news is the barrier is in no way absolute,impermeable or even real ultimately. The simple liberating power of saying "yes" or "why not?" to a social invitation,a change in routine,or an opportunity that comes up while noticing the sensations,feelings and thoughts that arise is enough,whether I say yes,no or maybe.

My concerns around energy preservation and commitment accompanied by over thinking an anticipated event are seen to be what they are - ego based projections into an imaginary future that simply does not exist. Giving way to the rich niagra of signals and sensations is disconcerting,but most importantly workable and usable. I can choose to let them be the fuel for committed action and intent. None of this would have been possible under the rejectionist reflex of clamping down and disowning discomfort,which I assure you I still default to from time and again. 

The question for the reader here is again,where do you say no in the flow of your experience? If you for example identify as a 9 where do you say no to saying no or perhaps to your own needs? As a type 1 where do you stand in judgement  against what is presented to you? Where is that no and how does it feel? If a 6 where is the no to fear as you counterphobically  harden against it? Of course the list goes on as the reader is free to pose the question as befits their experience,but if we can from time to time catch the thief of our life force at the door of experience as a recurrent practice,we can reclaim true living.

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